Recently I viewed a video on my Facebook newsfeed of a little 3 year old arguing with his mother. Over two million people had viewed it and several of us laughed as we watched him arguing with his mother, calling her “Linda” like he was on an adult level of negotiating. As I watched and laughed I immediately thought, how sad, he really thinks he is on the same level of rational reasoning as his mother. She even said, “I’m the mom.”
Having ministered to children for about 40 years, I can say that a very basic understanding of authority in a child’s life must be clear. Children develop insecurities when they are allowed to negotiate their rules and consequences as if they, in their long two or three years on the planet, know what they need.
A child knows deep down inside that they are the child and that they don’t really know what they need. When the parent doesn’t take charge in times of need, a fear sets in and they wonder, “Who is really protecting me and taking charge of the situation?”
Anger is another emotion that will set deep into a child who is allowed to have too much free reign. They don’t feel loved, because if you really love them you’ll help them gain control over their flesh and be the parent. We say around The Rock, “I love you enough to tell you the truth,” and that’s the kind of love a child needs.
On one hand, you want your child to develop their individual tastes and personality, and to be confident as the little wonderful person they are. However, the hierarchy of power in the home has to be very clear. The parental role in a child’s life is their first experience with authority out of which stems their view of God’s authority, future teachers, law enforcement, etc.
Respect, honor, submission: these are all major principles in God’s kingdom.